Understanding autism

Autism looks different for each person. Some signs can be visible and well recognised, while others are subtle - particularly in adults and people who have learned to mask or camouflage over time.

Masking or camouflaging

Many autistic adults describe a lifelong sense of being ‘different’. They may have learned to copy social behaviour, prepare phrases before conversations, or mirror others to fit in. This is known as masking or camouflaging. While it can help someone blend in, it can also be exhausting and lead to anxiety, burnout, or losing touch with who they really are.

In this episode of the Divergent Voices series, Purple Ella speaks to Dr Hannah Hayward and Emily-Katy about why autistic people mask and how to approach the process of unmasking.

Seeing autism more clearly

Autism is a lifelong neurodevelopmental difference, but the way it shows up can shift depending on a person’s surroundings, stress levels, and support. Some people may appear confident and capable in one setting yet struggle silently in another. For example, someone might appear socially skilled at work because they’ve learned scripts and routines, but feel drained afterwards and need solitude to recover.

For adults, common signs of autism can include:

• Needing time alone after socialising to recharge

• Feeling anxious or unsure in group settings

• Finding it easier to communicate in writing than face-to-face

• Struggling with small talk or unpredictable conversations

• Having intense or specific interests that bring joy and focus

• Preferring routine and finding change stressful

• Experiencing sensory sensitivities, such as being easily overwhelmed by noise, lights, textures, or smells

• Feeling emotions deeply but finding it hard to express them

• Having strong empathy, but feeling unsure how to show it in ways others expect

For many people, especially those who have learnt to mask or who do not fit common stereotypes, these signs can be overlooked or misinterpreted. They may develop strong coping mechanisms, such as copying peers, over-preparing for social situations, or becoming perfectionistic, that hide their differences. These strategies often come at a cost to mental health and energy levels.

Noticing these more subtle signs can make it easier to understand yourself or someone close to you. Being autistic doesn’t mean something is “wrong” - it simply means your brain processes the world differently. With understanding and the right support, those differences can become a foundation for wellbeing and self-confidence.

Autistic burnout

Many autistic adults experience something called autistic burnout. It’s a state of intense physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion caused by constantly trying to cope in environments that don’t meet autistic needs.

Burnout often builds up over time. It can follow periods of prolonged stress, social pressure, masking or camouflaging, sensory overload, or constant effort to meet expectations that feel overwhelming.

Burnout can overlap with the symptoms of depression or everyday tiredness, which can make it hard to recognise. However, it is not the same thing. It reflects the impact of long-term stress on a nervous system that has been working beyond its limits. Recovery often takes time, rest, and understanding, both from the person themselves and from those around them.

Recognising the early signs of burnout is an important step in self-care. Creating calmer routines, reducing sensory or social demands, and spending time in safe, supportive environments can all help the nervous system to recover. Most of all, autistic people need compassion and understanding, not pressure to keep pushing through. With space to rest and self-advocate for their needs, many find their energy and sense of self gradually return.

It is worth noting that these signs are not a complete list, and they are not exclusive to autism. Some can also be linked to other experiences or conditions, or to personality, stress, anxiety, depression, trauma, or everyday life pressures. If you recognise some of these in yourself, an autism assessment can help you understand what is driving them and whether they are related to autism or something else, so you can access the right support.